Day 135: Scale

Posted on May 15, 2014 by joshdaddy

It was pretty late last night by the time I carried in the bags of clothes and boxes of books and the one new bookshelf. I unpacked the books and put them in their new home, but I left the bags sitting on the floor in the bedroom for the next day.

So this morning, I unpacked that first bag–the one that I proudly packed last week–and promptly filled up two and a half drawers of a four drawer dresser. That takes care of the sweaters, I thought to myself, but where am I supposed to put the rest of my clothes?

I knew that we would be moving to a smaller house, but it certainly doesn’t feel too small for us. Clearly, though, we are going to have to live at a different scale. What appears “minimal” in one house may well be “more than enough” in another. I’m not talking about privation or austerity here–it’s just that without the extra space to stow away extra stuff, it becomes a lot easier to see just how much of that stuff is entirely unneeded.

I’m leaving all the sweaters up here for now–I’m sure I can find a donation site in the mountains just as easily as I can in the city, if it comes to that. But I’ll be taking back to Atlanta with me a different standard for just how much is enough–along with a renewed sense of freedom to let go of more than I think I can do without.

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Day 134: Shift

Posted on May 15, 2014 by joshdaddy

This afternoon, while I was loading some boxes of books into the van to bring up to North Carolina, my wife sidled up to me and said:

Hey, you know what? We’re moving to the mountains!

It’s amazing how fresh that news still seems, even though we’ve known it now for weeks.

While it seems like much of what I have written about lately has revolved around preparing for the move, I think something else is going on here beyond the packing and clearing and de-cluttering: we are being presented with an opportunity to re-craft our home, our habits, and our daily lives in a more deliberate and intentional manner. And trust me, I get it: a change in geography does not necessarily mean an automatic change in lifestyle, but it does provide a fertile opportunity for rethinking why and how we do the things we do.

Right now, I am writing this post sitting at my kitchen table at what will be our home for the next year. I’ve sat in this spot before over the years, typing away at my ancient workhorse of a laptop, tethered to my cell phone as my only point of internet access.

But around the corner, in the other room, there’s now a bookshelf that has never been in this house before. It’s an old bookshelf–I had it in my bedroom growing up, and I’m pretty sure before that it was kicking around with my dad for a number of years.

It’s the first real sign that something is shifting, as parts of our lives, individually and collectively, start to resettle into our new home.

I’m still not sure where all of this is going to take us, but I am definitely in for the ride!

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Day 133: Convert

Posted on May 14, 2014 by joshdaddy

It’s all about the books these days, folks.

We have three, six-foot bookshelves in one room; my short-term goal is to get rid of at least one of these bookshelves. I didn’t think I would accomplish that goal today, but I’m making steady progress. Meanwhile, I continue to pluck books off of other bookshelves around the house as well–some I’m adding to the going-to-read-in-the-next-year stack, and some go into other stacks destined to be dropped off at friends’ houses, commons areas at work, and various donation centers.

As I was looking at one particular stack of hardbacks in fairly good condition, I found myself wondering: what if I were to convert some of these give-aways into credit at our local used book store?

I know that sounds a bit counter-intuitive at first–why add to a book collection that I am struggling to thin out? But my thinking is this: if I can use a book swap as a motivation to let go of more of the books that I’m holding onto for no good reason, then I am absolutely ahead of the game.

So today, I loaded up a bag with a dozen or so books and headed down to the used bookstore. About half of them the bookstore passed on, so those went off to the donation stack. The other six or seven books I converted into two new additions to the small stack of books I plan to read during our first year in North Carolina.

Tomorrow is going to be a challenge–after the kids get out of school and I get home from work, the plan is to load up the van with bags of winter clothes, books destined for my new office, plus one small bookshelf and a stack of read-worthy books, and then hit the road.

Wow. Just writing that list of tasks has me exhausted. I guess I better get some sleep!

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Day 132: Stack

Posted on May 12, 2014 by joshdaddy

IMG_2399Tonight I tackled a measly, little bookshelf.

Most of what I have on this little, wooden bookshelf are work-related books: scholarship that touches upon my own work in one way, shape or form. Some of these points of contact are pretty dated. Others are areas of ongoing interest.

In theory, at least. In practice, most of these books have gone untouched for many years. One one hand, I suppose I could just chuck the whole lot, but I can’t quite bring myself to do that. Not today, at least.

What I did instead was to pack up three hefty stacks of books–enough to fill three milk crates. I also managed to pull out a fourth stack as well, which are now awaiting donation. The three milk crates of books that remain will come with me up to North Carolina in a few days, where they will find a home in my new office.

IMG_2402And this little bookshelf? It’s coming with me too.

It’s small enough that it will fit well into the furnished house we are moving into. My goal–over the next day or so, to pull off of the other bookshelves around the house only those books I can imagine myself reading in the next year.

I started on that process tonight, and as I pulled down books that had been sitting on shelves for years, still unread, I had to ask: if I’m not going to read this book in the next year, why am I still holding onto it?

That question helped me pull a second stack of donation-worthy books off the shelf and into a bag in the basement. It’s slow progress, but it’s progress nonetheless. I am sure I will end up holding onto more books that I “should,” but I am also pleased to know that I can shed as many books as I already have… and not really notice it at all.

Perhaps I can get those three milk crates of books down to two before I load them in the car on Wednesday….

 

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Day 131: Bask

Posted on May 11, 2014 by joshdaddy

IMG_2386Sometimes I feel like I’m cheating on these posts–I mean, just the other day I was writing about the importance of enjoying the day. And I’ve written about how much I enjoy climbing outdoors with my kids. So did I really “experiment” with anything new today?

Maybe not. But I did have a wonderful day not doing it.

I wrapped up this solo weekend of hanging out with all three kids by spending the day outdoors at Foster Falls. It’s a beautiful spot in Tennessee, and truly a climbing destination. We slept in late and took our time getting there this morning, even though we knew that we would have to leave early enough to get back to Atlanta for a Mother’s Day dinner. But still, we had enough time to enjoy being outdoors together.

So I supose today was simply a day to bask in the beauty of the day. Tomorrow I am sure there will be all sorts of things to toss out, and all sorts of boxes to begin loading. For today, though, it was a good day to be outdoors and enjoy the rock and the sun with my children.

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Day 130: Note

Posted on May 11, 2014 by joshdaddy

Sometimes I find myself writing a couple of paragraphs for this blog, only to delete everything and start all over again.

And that’s what I just did.

I was starting to write a pretty involved reflection on the emotions I’ve been feeling today–namely, the sadness that started to well up as I started to think about the friends that we will be leaving behind when we move in a few weeks.

But I’ve decided to resist getting into that, at least for tonight. I think I need to reflect on those feelings in silence for a while, and then see if I can find the words.

And the truth is: I felt many other emotions today as well–excitement, disappointment, happiness, frustration, and so on. I’m content to note these emotions as they arise, and realize that regardless of the emotion–“good” or “bad”–it will come and pass.

Ok, I seem to be drifting back into the involved reflection that I thought I had just avoided. I’ve just spent the past ten minutes writing and deleting sentences; maybe the best thing to do right now is just stop typing….

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Day 129: Enjoy

Posted on May 9, 2014 by joshdaddy

I was going to title today’s post “Cherish,” but that word seems just a little too precious to describe a 100 mile car ride with three kids….

Last week, I was reminding myself to appreciate each day for what it is–a gift. Today, I suppose, is a repeat performance of that same idea. And it is absolutely a lesson that bears repeating.

I’m spending the weekend with all three kids on my own. We’re up in Chattanooga for two days–one day at a regional championship for two of my three kids, and then the next day for some outdoor climbing. It’s not the first time I’ve had all three kids on my own, and it probably won’t be the last time either.

But it could be.

My oldest is fourteen years old, and while it is quite the cliché to say it: those fourteen years have flown by. I consider myself pretty lucky that he still enjoys spending as much time as he does with me and his brother and sister.

My middle child will be twelve in a few days, and the “baby” is now eight. The truth is: it won’t be long before these sorts of trips will only exist in “remember when” stories.

Trust me: I’m not romanticizing spending hours in a car with three kids, or holing up together in a hotel room. There are plenty of opportunities for me to be irritated, exasperated, or just plain worn out.

But tonight, in the midst of the silliness, and laughter, and bickering, and fussing, I am trying to remember to enjoy it while it lasts.

As an old friend used to say to me pretty often:

Remember, Mark–these are the good old days.

 

 

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Day 128: Pack

Posted on May 8, 2014 by joshdaddy

OK, it was just one bag. But still: it’s a start, right?

I am heading up to North Carolina in about a week and will be taking care of a few odds and ends while I’m there. My wife and I talked about trying to pack up a few things to bring with me on this trip, to help make the big move a little less big. So I started today, with my “winter clothes.”

I wouldn’t say I have a seasonal wardrobe or anything, but I do have quite a pile of sweaters and sweatshirts. I shed quite a few back in January, but I still have probably more than I need.

I tried to fit all of them, along with a couple of heavy, long sleeve jerseys, into a single duffle bag…. and failed. Which was a good thing, really: it gave me an opportunity to shed a few more until I could get the bag zipped shut. I’m sure there are a couple of other sweatshits kicking around the house somewhere, but for all intents and purposes, I’ve managed to get all of my “winter clothes” into a single bag.

That’s all I tackled today–though I plan to have several more bags ready by next Wednesday… maybe even a couple of boxes of books!

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Day 127: Exploit

Posted on May 7, 2014 by joshdaddy

Oh, I know that sounds like such a bad word, but hear me out.

To be honest, “today’s” challenge has really been going on for the past three days. When I dropped off my oldest at his middle school on Monday, I noticed a sign advertising an upcoming book fair. I asked our carpool companion twins (who are usually more up on these sorts of things) if the school was accepting donations, and they responded yes. Wonderful! Now I just had to figure out where to drop off stacks of books, and when.

And that’s when it got even easier.

As we pulled up into the carpool lane, a parent volunteer handed me a slip of paper, letting me know that the school was looking for donated books, and all I had to do was drop them off any morning during carpool, all week long.

“What about every morning?” I asked.

“We’ll take whatever you’ve got to give!”

So that’s what I’ve done for the past two mornings. Each night, I have wandered about the house from bookshelf to bookshelf, plucking off books that are relatively easy for me to shed. My goal–just two milk crates’ worth of books. That’s all I can fit in my trunk, along with three backpacks and a couple of musical instruments. And that’s about all I can manage in one sitting, without getting too bogged down in deciding what to keep and what to cull.

And that’s been today’s lesson. Or I guess that was Monday’s lesson, if you want to get technical, which has carried over into today–I need to take advantage of every opportunity to make minimizing easier…especially when what I get rid of will ultimately benefit someone else.

Now let’s hope some of those old books actually sell and raise some money for the school!

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Day 126: Clear

Posted on May 7, 2014 by joshdaddy

IMG_2348I tried to clear out the upstairs bathroom closet yesterday, but yielded to my wife’s request to make it an early night. But tonight I am on it. And boy, am I in over my head.

This closet is, well, I am not sure what to say about it. It would put Fibber McGee to shame. I’ve actually had to take two breaks so far, and I’ve now recruited my wife to help me work through the layers upon layers of God-knows-what that has found a home in here.

So far, here are the completely unnecessary things I’ve found, and promptly thrown away:

  • Fertility monitoring strips
  • A pregnancy test kit
  • One stray diaper (clean)
  • One plastic baby wipe container (empty)
  • Thrush medicine
  • Infant vitamin drops
  • Many, many half-full hotel courtesy bottles of shampoo & conditioner
  • Expired prescriptions (oldest so far: 1997)
  • And so on….

I’m not sure I will get through the towel-reduction tonight, but by my best count, we have around 35 bath towels (most of which are presently in need of a wash). I think cutting that number in half is probably a good target.

As my wife and I started to work through the remainder of the stuff in the closet, I could see her going through the same thought process that I have struggled with over the past few months, and still do on occassion. I held up a stack of linen hand towels that I am pretty sure I moved from one bathroom closet–unused–eleven years ago, to this bathroom closet, where they have remained unused to this day. When I asked what we should do with them, she replied:

“I’m not going to throw away perfectly good hand towels. Those could come in handy some day!”

After a few minutes of talking through what we were doing, and why we were doing it, the linen hand towels made their way into the donation bag, along with a table cloth (I have no idea why there was a table cloth in the bathroom closet), a shower curtain, and (no, I’m not kidding) a solitary, Christmas-themed oven mitt.

IMG_2350We plowed on through the rest of it, generating bag after bag of stuff that would  end up either in a landfill or at a donation center.

To be honest it was a little unsettling how much of what we cleared couldn’t be donated–there’s not a lot of call for expired medications and half-used bottles of children’s vitamins.

In the end, we cleared out the closet of just about anything that didn’t have an immediate or easily foreseeable use. The tricky part, though, will be to keep it that way.

 

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